This Has to Be Homer Simpson...
PRAGUE (Reuters) - A Czech man is being taken to court after he hid in a restaurant washroom until the employees had left and then hooked up beer kegs directly to his mouth.
Cleaning staff found him drunk and lying on the floor of the bar at the restaurant in the city of Brno, about 200km (120 miles) east of Prague, the CTK news agency reported on Thursday.
"He had broken the door of the cooling mechanism ... and detached the hoses leading from the keg, squashed them in his mouth and literally filled himself up with beer," CTK quoted a police official as saying.
The man will be charged with damaging property because he caused 8,000 crown ($340) damage to the beer cooling box.
Listerine Drinker Arrested for DUI (AP)
ADRIAN, Mich. - A woman who admitted drinking three glasses of Listerine mouthwash had a blood-alcohol content more than three times the legal limit when she was arrested for drunken driving, police said Friday.
The woman, identified by police Sgt. Mike Shadbolt as 50-year-old Carol A. Ries, was arrested Sunday night and released on personal bond the next day. She was to be arraigned late next week on a misdemeanor charge of operating under the influence of liquor, Shadbolt said.
Police also found an open bottle of Listerine in Ries' car, and asked Lenawee County prosecutors Friday to authorize a warrant charging her with having an open intoxicant in a motor vehicle, Shadbolt said. Calls to the prosecutor's office were not answered after business hours.
Ries showed signs of intoxication after her car rear-ended another vehicle Sunday, Shadbolt said. She told police she had not consumed any alcohol and also passed a Breathalyzer test, but "there was something not quite right about her," Shadbolt said.
She failed a second test using different equipment and, under further questioning, admitted to drinking three glasses of Listerine earlier in the day, Shadbolt said.
According to Listerine manufacturer Pfizer Inc.'s Web site, original formula Listerine contains 26.9 percent alcohol, more than four times that of many malt liquors. Other varieties contain 21.6 percent alcohol.
Noisy Lovemaking No Cause for Eviction
(AP) STOCKHOLM, Sweden - Noisy lovemaking is no cause for eviction — so long as it's done in the daytime, a Swedish landlord said Thursday.
The Tunabyggen housing company in Borlaenge, 137 miles northwest of Stockholm, made the decision after the neighbors of one amorous couple complained about their afternoon delights.
But the company, which runs the block of apartments, said lovemaking is part of normal family life and not grounds for eviction.
Indeed, it's the law. Under the Swedish Housing Act, neighbors are not to be disturbed by loud noises — be it music, television or love making in the evening. But that law also guarantees the right of tenants to a normal family life, too.
Tunabyggen's marketing director Lena Lundberg said the complaint about the lovemaking was akin to that of a family with noisy children whose crying could disturb the neighbors.
The complaint, which was filed this week, was thrown out, she added, because the noise wasn't at night. "It's comparable with babies having colic," she said, adding that a family with a crying baby couldn't be evicted.
Speaker Touts Stripping to 8th Graders
(AP) SAN FRANCISCO - The principal of a Palo Alto middle school may not invite a popular speaker back to an annual career day after he told girls they could earn a good living as strippers.
Management consultant William Fried told eighth-graders at Jane Lathrop Stanford Middle School on Tuesday that stripping and exotic dancing can pay $250,000 or more per year, depending on their bust size.
"It's sick, but it's true," Fried said in an interview later. "The truth of the matter is you can earn a tremendous amount of money as an exotic dancer, if that's your desire."
Fried has given a popular 55-minute presentation, "The Secret of a Happy Life," at the school's career day the past three years. He counsels students to experiment with a variety of interests until they discover something they love and excel in.
But school principal Joseph Di Salvo said Fried may not be back next year. The principal said Fried's comments to the class came after some of them asked him to expand on why he included "exotic dancing" on his list of 140 potential careers.
Fried spent about a minute answering questions, defining strippers and exotic dancers synonymously. According to Jason Garcia, 14, he told students: "For every 2 inches up there, you should get another $50,000 on your salary."
"A couple of students egged him and he took it hook, line and sinker," said Di Salvo, who also said the students took advantage of a substitute teacher overseeing the session.
"It's totally inappropriate," Di Salvo said. "It's not OK by me. I would want my presenters to kind of understand that they are coming into a career day for eighth-graders."
That stripping advice wasn't the only thing that riled parents. Di Salvo said one mother said she was outraged when her son announced that he was forgoing college for a field he loves: fishing.
"He really focused on finding what you really love to do," said Mariah Cannon, 13. Fried, 64, said he does not think he offended any of the students: "Eighth-grade kids are not dumb," he said. "They are pretty worldly."
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