a farmer has over 800 laying chickens. But one day his rooster dies. The farmer goes to the bird store to get a new rooster. The clerk gave him a huge rooster and said it would do the job. The farmer goes home, throws the rooster in with the chickens. The rooster rides one, then dies. The farmer goes back to the store and demands a new rooster. The clerk hands him and even bigger rooster than before and says it will do the job for sure. The guy goes home, throws the rooster in with the chickens. The rooster rides one, then dies.

By now the farmer is pissed off. He goes to the store and demands a new rooster. The clerk gives him the scrawniest chicken ever! The guy didn’t have a choice so he goes home, throws the rooster in with the chickens. The rooster rode all them chickens twice before the farmer grabbed him. he threw the rooster in the shed till morning. The next morning the guy goes to the shed only to find that the rooster had drilled through. He found all his chickens tired, his dog cowering in the corner, and his horses all limping. The guy gets scared thinking about the neighboring farm. He finds the rooster flat on his back near the road, two vultures circling over head. The farmer goes to check on the rooster, when suddenly it opened its eyes and said ”man fuck off you’ll scare em away.

A little girl and her dad were driving down the road. When they passed an old woman’s car, a dick landed on the windshield. The little girl said, “what was that daddy?” The dad didn’t want to tell her what it really was so he lied and said it was a fly. Then the little girl said, “that fly had a big dick.”

There is this guy who has speech problems. he went out to the drug store to get some gum. he asked the lady at the counter for some ‘bum’. she said you mean gum? the man said yes and bought the gum. T

hen he went to the department store to get a bucket. he asked the man at the counter if the had any ‘fuckets’. the man said, you mean buckets? the man said yes, bought the bucket

Then he went to the pet store to buy his daughter a puppy for her b-day. When he got there he asked the lady at the counter if they had any ‘cockandspankits’. the lady said, you mean cockerspainelles? the man said yes.

While he was paying for the puppy, another customer walked through the door and the puppy ran outside. The man went to chase after the puppy, he found the closest person and said, “Can you hold my bum and fuckit while i go catch my cock and spank it?”

There was this family and they were too poor to buy food so this old man went and shot them a squirrel. It still had the bb’s in it.

They ate and it was the lil girls bedtime and the lil boy went outside.

One lil girl came down: Mommy mommy i peed a bb. That’s good hunny go back to bed.

The other lil girl came down mommy mommy i peed a bb.

Thats good hunny go back to bed.

The lil boy came in and said mommy mommy. Let me guess u peed a bb.

No i was jacking off in the back yard and shot the dog.